Brad Walsh

The Boartoise and the Hair

I’m beginning to think Al Gore was right and Manbearpig is our greatest threat. First there was the pig with a monkey face and now there’s a big lumpy whatsit washing ashore in Montauk. Next comes a human-plant hybrid and the Loch Ness Hamster.

I know I’m behind on this but I finally listened to the Sam Sparro promo I got a while back and recognized “Black and Gold” as the song I heard in some store a few times and liked. I don’t really like much else on the album; he has a great voice but a lot of it is too R&B or Europop for me. I do like “Pocket” and “Sick,” which sort of sound like they could have been on the new Presets album.

Sam Sparro – Black and Gold

BRAD: what if it turns out to really be an experiment
BRAD: at that place [the nearby gov't animal lab]
BRAD: and they made a weird beaky dogbirdpig with turtle hands and hind legs
BRAD: WHAT WILL YOU DO
KATHY: i will never ever go to the beach again
KATHY: it looks like it was boiled
KATHY: and it looks like its little hand things are tied together
KATHY: which means it was bad and being restrained
KATHY: i need a pencil in that photo for scale.
KATHY: god, it just looks like something that would make you solve a riddle to pass.
KATHY: “what goes on four legs when it’s young, then two legs, then three legs? then washes up on the motherfucking beach in the hamptons looking like a ham with a beak?”