Thursday, November 29th, 2007
It is both possible and easy to be professional, efficient, honest, and polite all at the same time. My time was supremely wasted this week. Resulted in a laughably out of touch product, though, which I’m glad my name is not attached to. It’s a bit like attempting to compile a definitive list of American presidents who were assassinated, failing to include Kennedy or Lincoln, and only soliciting quotes from Mexican nationals.
Next week I’m going to Miami Beach to photograph some things, which makes me nervous; anytime I go far away from home I get skittish. I always imagine I will end up lost and robbed and stabbed when I’m in a new place. I think I’m too neurotic and worrisome to enjoy a life that includes travel, or a life that includes all the things I say I want, come to think of it.
Tuesday, November 27th, 2007
last night i woke up at 4am to a guy wailing hopelessly in the street to a girl, something passionate and probably romantic comedy gold, but i sat up in bed and started coughing. felt uneasy, went to the bathroom and thought i was going to be sick. calmed down and went back to bed and thought about the things i had eaten during the day that may have been bad to me. then i realized that i all i ate or drank all day was a small bowl of bare pasta and two cups of coffee in the morning. drank a big glass of water and went back to bed. whenever kathy is traveling to other cities i am home alone and i forget to eat, but not drinking is some other kind of dangerous. don’t forget to drink!
Thursday, November 15th, 2007
teaberry
ticklebritches
bookbag
audi
pastrami
volksvahgen
robert lehman
turdsplash
smedley
Tuesday, November 6th, 2007
“I was 15 minutes off of my goal time, but at least i came in before katie holmes!”
“Hey logical. thanks to seasonique im not pregnant with your faggoty love child.”
“A blind man with a ny marathon number just bumped into me. HAHAHAHAHA”
“I’m going to confiscate the smarties.”
“Just stop eating them! No more smarties!”
“god smarties are the most depressing candy”
“Im eating at some restaurant on a wharf”
“Feist sings like Star Jones talks”
“Yay! Did you pick a peck of pickled wait this joke is horrible”
“I just ate a frescata”
“Im with Toni Braxton eating lobster rolls”
“no toni b is in my room checking brandy’s myspace. for clues.”
“No Tony Danza is in yr living room drinking Brandy”
“already called telma hopkins to come with her cat o nine tails”
“rah digga is here we r watchin rugrats”
“you busy? wanna come do me in the can?”
“My hotel has a grilled cheese vending machine!”
“Every single girl in RI wears flares and a hoodie and uggs”
“Isn’t Chloe Sevigny too old for Ruff Club?”
“Come to my apt. im wasted…”
“howie mandel is a liquid”
“save the wedges! you can throw out the reindeer tho unless you wanna keep it for old times sake”
“i tote just saw the cute boy from gossip girl at tekserve”
“Does anna have any blood i can use tont?”
“‘You’re the faggot who makes everything sparkle’ -woman on the phone in h&m/the way i feel about you”
“Everyone is SO straightedge here haha.”
“Want me to come rescue you drunky?”
“I’m so happy for you! I am working otherwise I would come bask in your glory”
“easier to get in bed and make mistakes with. The foundation of any decent partnership imho”
“I NEED A BIGGER NET!”
“Belvedere? is diddy there?”
“Please stop posting our personal nudes on your website. My mom won’t stop calling.”
“I LOVE MY NEW PROFILE PICTURE”
“A marine who looks like chad white just bent over in front of me and wow”
“im in your basement”
“do ridiculously tight pants count as leggings?”
“Does the mascara runneth like rivers of blood?”
“AND GOD SAYETH THERE SHALL BE FLAT HAIR!”
“Most brutal lesbian couple at the airport. Merrells! Fannypack! Beaded glasses chain! Washed out vacation destination t shirts! HAIR GEL!”
“the guy im dating says he is into necromance. is that like kissing on the neck?”
Monday, November 5th, 2007
It felt kind of good being randomly offered a real part in a real movie and turning it down. Now I can tell my friends. And my friends will say “that’s great” and be interested for three seconds like they would have if I would have done it, but this way I don’t have to do any real work! Also, I bought a punch fountain.
