Toothpicks to Hold My Eyes Open

Without Kathy and her expert navigation skills, Jason and I got lost on the drive home last night at three in the morning (and we were the first to leave the party!), and now that we’ve slept maybe four hours, I’m ingesting coffee like Paula Abdul ingests vodka and crazy pills. All night long people were saying “are you Brad Walsh?” and introducing themselves to me. One or two in a night isn’t that uncommon when we are in the company of hundreds, but this was just weird. I felt like Melissa… only, with class. YOW!

(He said, knowing full well that he was an asshole with a skull bandana around his neck not seven hours ago. And Melissa is classier than eighth grade social studies. Qualify, qualify.)

This morning my eyes opened and noticed that the alarm had not beeped us awake when it should have twenty-five minutes before. I said “great” and managed to get completely ready to leave the house in ten minutes. In fact, the D arrived just as I walked down the stairs, and there was no bridge traffic, so I rolled up into the office this morning ten minutes early. Yeah, I’m awesome like that. What?

4 Comments to Toothpicks to Hold My Eyes Open

  • by anonymousmom

    On April 26, 2006 at 4:31 pm

    you heard me.

  • by nicole-yeah that one

    On April 26, 2006 at 6:47 pm

    screw the coffee. hop on the paula abdul bandwagon and toss back some grey goose and vicodin-seems to work nicely for her

  • by brad

    On April 27, 2006 at 3:47 pm

    if paula’s downing any bird-themed alcohol, i’m willing to bet it’s more along the lines of wild turkey than grey goose

  • by acaiberry

    On January 2, 2009 at 4:33 pm

    Hola
    What is up guys?
    I have a question thats been in my head for a long time.. What is acai berry?
    I keep seeing commercials on tv and banners on the internet so im finally beginnging to get curious.
    I guess its some fruit that is very healthy for you and your skin?
    I wouldnt mind losing a few pounds so i kind of want to buy acai berry .. so if any
    of you know any good online stores that would be great!
    I also saw it was featured on OPRAH so maybe there is some truth to this lol.

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